milk and honey by Rupi Kaur

Militant Baker recently wrote a post called 8 brilliant books I am currently reading. Milk and honey by Rupi Kaur was on that list. Her review told me it was poetry, but the beautiful matte black cover, simple text format, and art is what drew me in. I bought it having no interest in the words inside and then I flipped it open

you were so afraid
of my voice
i decided to be
afraid of it too
— Rupi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 17

The words drew me in and suddenly the book was over. Maybe I've never been drawn to poetry before because I've never found anything that I could connect with. Maybe it's a genre I've just never given a chance before. But this book was wonderful. It's broken down into 4 sections - the hurting, the loving, the breaking and the healing. Within each section was a whirl of emotions and while I can relate to some, I took others to probably mean different things than the author intended. Taking her beautiful words and applying it to my life. 

The Hurting

trying to convince myself
i am allowed
to take up space
is like writing with
my left hand
when i was born to use my right
(the idea of shrinking is hereditary)
— Rupi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 29

The hurting put words to some things I'd been thinking lately. Part of it is in relation to how I grew up. But part of it is, is how I see a friend and her relationship with her husband, especially the first poem above about being afraid of her voice. Recently when we were together, she continually apologized for talking so much because her husband gets frustrated when she does it at home. One should never be silenced and it breaks my heart a lot. 

Taking up space is something I've learned with time. I am still terrible at it (for example not doing yoga during our vacation), but the fact is I am allowed space. 

The Loving

i am learning
how to love him
by loving myself
— Rupi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 55

This section was very explicate in a non explicate way, if that makes sense. I found lines within these pages that perfectly fit how I was trying to write about Kevin for his birthday post. However Rupi Kaur didn't just focus on loving others, she also brings up self love and it's importance, like in the poem above this paragraph. Those words express how I feel about my journey to loving others. While the poem directly below, is how I worry about the words "I love you" (technically this poem was in the next section of the book). I stress out about the meaning of "I love you" and I worry about my meaning behind them too. 

you whisper
i love you
what you mean is
i don’t want you to leave
— Rupi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 92

The Breaking

The biggest section of the book. Also the section I related the most to breaking my connection with my parents. When traveling the biggest worry I had was that I wouldn't be able to hold onto the person I had became. The people we had invited don't treat me badly and so I don't feel like I did that. However these words perfectly described my fears, should I ever cross paths with my parents again. 

i am confident i am over you. so much that some mornings i wake up with a smile on my face and my hands pressed together thanking the universe for pulling you out of me. thank god i cry. thank god you left. i would not be the empire i am today if you had stayed.

but then.

there are some nights i imagine what i might do if you showed up. how if you walked into the room this very second every awful thing you’ve ever done would be tossed out the closest window and all the love would rise up again. it would pour through my eyes as if it never really left in the first place. as if it’s been practicing how to stay silent so long only so it could be this loud on your arrival. can someone explain that. how even when the love leaves. it doesn’t leave. how even when i am so past you. i am so helplessly brought back to you.
— Rapi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 132

The Healing

I am so happy this ended on with healing. Full circle, complete is how everything wrapped up. I loved Rupi Kaur's writing and will be following her for future works (she has another coming out October 3!). She has introduced me to the world of poetry and I hope to find more to enjoy. Pick up this book if you can and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. I'd like to leave you with one last quote, it's very much how I feel about my blog sometimes.

the thing about writing is
i can’t tell if it’s healing
or destroying me
— Rupi Kaur - Milk and Honey, page 148