Finding a Place to Begin
Life is quiet lately. Quiet in a way that is good.
I stopped doing a few things a month ago. The catalyst was Instagram and the yoga community on there. I felt lost and was disappointed in the yoga community so taking a break felt like a good idea. And it was.
However I didn't realize that when stepping away from one thing that other things would be affected. My at home yoga practice came to a halt and my adventures out doors to take pictures almost ceased. A lot of the confidence I had gained while challenge myself to do both those things slowly started to disappear. With that came my dissatisfaction in studio yoga practice. I grew frustrated and angered at the practice because it felt like it was all about the exercise, the weight loss, and skinny white people. Everywhere I turned it was the promotion of those things and those are not all I want from yoga. I want a deep sense of connection to my body. To better understand how it works and flows. Movement is so important to me but the brains movement needs to connect with the body's and where I am practicing doesn't have the capabilities to connect the two, most days. In fact, some classes do a great job at breaking that connection.
Changing where I am practicing isn't really an option. Changing my mindset and the media content I absorb are.
I've enjoyed the quiet ways of life while taking a break from Instagram and as I dive back into the community my goal is to be able to maintain that quiet. Find the way I need to practice and let the rest go. With that hopefully fear found in shooting outside with dissipate and be replaced with confidence. Starting over I think it's something you do multiple times in your life. Maybe that's a good thing, maybe it's how we grow. Doesn't make it easier.