Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
|Hosted by Kristin from My Life as a Tea Cup|
This month for book club we are reading a non-fiction book called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. I was very hesitant on picking this book up because I already have a few non-fiction books on the go. Adding another didn't seem like a good idea. And it is, however I am enjoying it. This time however I have decided to post the questions and my answers once a week verses in one big post at the end.
So these are this weeks questions
1. Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert? How/when did you discover this? Do the people in your life (friends, family, coworkers) understand this about you and what it means you need?
I am definitely an introvert. Though for many years I have played being an extrovert. I knew I was being drained and it was slowly making me sick and hate working. I quit my job on January 2 and since then have been hiding away at home. I feel like I am slowly recharging. My family definitely doesn't understand why I am not yet looking for work. They don't understand that I am so overstimulated that I need this space at home.
2. It was interesting for me to learn that the rise of the Extrovert Ideal coincided with the increasing move into urban areas, working in factories and otherwise interacting with strangers. Do you think our culture will swing the other way now with more and more people working online exclusively, from home or with limited work contact with others in person?
I don't think the extrovert ideal is going anywhere. But I do think it's changing. With the online community and the shift to working at home, introverts can start to thrive more.
3. What is the difference between being extroverted and being a leader? Is there a difference? Do they always go hand in hand? (Do you think the quiet leaders detailed in the book ever had to fake being extroverted on their way to the top?)
Extroverts don't listen, this is the major reason I just quit my job. My boss is very much like Tony Robbins first mentioned on page 34. She is absolutely the worst manager I have ever had. It was a great growing experience for me, to understand how I could not work with a person like that. Many of my previous managers are fake extroverts who have made their way to the top, and that is why allot of them are still some of my favorite people.
I think that whether a leader is an extrovert or an introvert how they deal with things greatly comes from their life experiences. Some extroverts may handle things poorly. While others may have a good balance. Some like my old manager may hopefully grow into the role better as time moves on and they evolve.
The one thing I wish I could include on my blog is the Facebook conversation. It was so interesting reading people's answer to the questions and seeing the different views. If you would like, join the NovelTea Book Club here.
I made a few highlights while reading, right now I have only made it through the Introduction and Chapters 1 & 2. But here are my highlights.
"Introverts living under the Extrovert Ideal are like women in a man's world, discounted because of a trait that goes to the core of who they are."
Introvert People that surprised me: Eleanor Roosevelt, Warren Buffett, Gandhi, Rosa Parks.
Email List called the Introvert Retreat
"It implies that every encounter is a high-stakes game in which we win or lose the other person's favor" - this is how I felt about work. Every person I met was that "potential" customer and when I didn't get them as a customer SHAME.
"Bus to Abelene" - very interesting anecdote
Chapter Two - Does God Love Introverts? An Evangelical's Dilemma
I don't do religion. When it's in books I usually put it down and refuse to pick it up, unless I am doing it for a specific reason or for research. So when Chapter two dedicated a whole section to religion I was disappointed. But then I started reading. I underlined alot of this section. Because it put into words what I use to feel when I did attend church.
"Events like this (as in big church services) don't give me the sense of oneness others seem to enjoy, it's always been private occasions that make me feel connected to the joys and sorrows of the world."
" "Everything in the service involved communication," he says with a gentle exasperation. "Greeting people, the lengthy sermon, the singing. There was no emphasis on quiet, liturgy, ritual, things that give you space for contemplation."
And this one remembers me of On the fence Christians (ones who are Christians on Sundays and the worst during the rest of the week)
"If you don't love Jesus out loud, then it must not be real love. It's not enough to forge your own spiritual connection to the divine; it must be displayed publicly."
Sarah Cain should write something called and about "Learning to Negotiate when your an Introvert" - I'd read it